Sunday Feb 13
Lazy day today. Overcast, cool, and likely to rain. Not ideal weather for outdoor activities. So, S and I do some colouring, make some craft, and set up the Zhu Zhu pet spiral slide that we picked up yesterday with S's birthday money from Grandpa D. I'm not always the most patient person, and this plastic toy set nearly got the best of me! It doesn't help that once it's set up, S only really wants to play with it for another 10 minutes. Sigh.
So, we move into the back room to play Barbie online games and Barbie Island Princess. Over lunch, the 3 of us finish watching Fantasia. Then it's back to the computer room for a bit more Barbie until S reminds me that I said she could watch a movie. So, we managed to squeeze in "Barbie in a Mermaid Tale.'
I'm feeling stressed about the Detox diet. The more I think about having to give up caffeine, gluten and my favourite Jalna yogurts, the more I crave carbs, sugar and comfort food. I even ate 3 lollies today: 2 toffee chews and 1 Starburst chew. Usually I can manage to control these urges. I think I'm going to have to talk to J about it.
I feel really bad. I did agree to do the Detox with her, but it just seems to involve so much extra work- like meal preparation. And I can't seem to master that eating 'normally', let alone being super careful to stick to the diet. Maybe I'm not ready for a detox yet. Part of me thinks that I'd be able to give up caffeine (which I know won't be pleasant) but I'm not convinced about the gluten or the normal dairy. I wonder if I could ease into it? Not go straight into the detox, but give up a few things at a time. I've mostly given up sugar, but on this detox, I wouldn't even be allowed to substitute with Xylitol. Sigh. I don't know what to do. Well, that's not entirely true- I know what I want to do, but I don't know how to break it to J.
Instead, I snuggle S in closer to me as we watch the movie. That's the best bit about watching movies with her -holding her close and just having her with me. I don't even mind watching the same movies over and over.
Before I know it, the day is over and it's time to pack up and head off to meet C. S has a big week ahead of her. School, swimming lessons on Monday and of course, gymnastics on Saturday. I want to make sure we meet C at a reasonable time so S can get a good night's sleep.
Today, as I gave her a hug & kiss good-bye she said, "I'm not going to cry today, Mumma Jay''.
I rumpled her hair, smiled at her and said, "Good girl! Cuz you know you're going to see me again really soon, right?'
She nodded. "Yes! I love you!'
I stood and waved as they drove out of the parking lot. No guarantee that I wasn't going to cry. Aside from a few tears, I was ok. She is growing up so fast and I am so proud of her.
Saturday Feb 12 Vegetarian Yum Cha
Up at the crack of dawn, just like a work day. The poor cat doesn't know what hit him! He raises his head, squints a blue eye open just a crack and gives me a funny look as if to say 'but it's Saturday', before lowering his head back down onto his paw. I hop into the shower. G goes to the kitchen to turn the kettle on. We're ready to go by 7.10am. Off to watch S do gymnastics!
GPS gets us to our location without too much drama and we're even 10 minutes early! It's a huge complex with a pool at one end, the gymnastics gym in the middle and a fitness gym with all the usual equipment at the other end. There are people everywhere! Welcome to Saturday morning sport, I think to myself! S & C arrive about 5mins past 8. S runs up and leaps into my arms! I swing her around and relish the tight grip she has on me. I've missed her just as much as she's missed me. Her group is lining up on the mats, so she pulls off her shoes and runs to join them.
I can't believe how fit these kids are! 12 yr old boys with abs like Brad Pitt! Amazing!! C jokingly tells us she'll be enrolling S's baby brother in gymnastics as soon as he's old enough so that he can have a physique like them! I laughed and joked back, telling her it's just so she doesn't have to spend her Saturdays on the cricket pitch!
It was wonderful to watch S with her group. I couldn't believe some of the things she is capable of doing. She could hang from the lower parallel bar and draw her knees to her chest and just dangle there until her instructor told her she could drop. I want core muscles like that!! And she climbed the rope like a little monkey!! Amazing! I'm so proud of her.
Then it was off to The Green Gourmet in Newtown for vegetarian yum cha. Talk about yum! It's probably more carbs than I should be eating, but it tastes so good! It was a lovely treat for the three of us. S loves it too.
We stopped by Broadway Shopping Centre on our way home. Grandpa D sent S some money for her birthday and since her birthday is so close to Christmas, we thought it would be nice for her to choose what she really wanted. She was in her ELEMENT! It took her awhile, but she finally settled on 3 items.
Then it was home to relax. S was pretty tuckered out after her first full week of school and an hour of gymnastics! We played with her new 'Barbie Glitterizer'. Then, we watched a movie, ate some dinner, gave her a quick bath and tucked her into bed. G and I weren't too far behind! I knew S would be up early tomorrow.
Friday Feb 11
Tuckered out. I can't seem to get enough sleep these days. It doesn't matter when I go to bed, I'm exhausted when I wake up. We decide to catch the train today. Normally, we'd take the car so I could race off after work to meet C to pick up Sophia. We decided that it would be a better idea this weekend to let her sleep at C's tonight. It's the end of her first full week at 'Kindergarten'. By the time I make it to Castle Hill through the traffic, it will be at least 6.30 pm. Then it's another 40 minutes to an hour to get to our place. Even with a quick catch up and dinner, it will be 8.30 at least by the time we tuck her into bed.
If we didn't have to worry about getting up the next morning, that would be fine. S has enrolled in gymnastics on a Saturday morning and her class starts at 8am. That would mean getting up at 6am and leaving by 7am to get her there on time. I think it would be asking too much of my little girl to do all of that racing around. So, I decided to forfeit Friday night, so that she could be well-rested.
It's my day off the phones and I'm working hard to get through as many of my cases as I can.
Thursday Feb 10
Tired this morning. Even though I only have 1 class on a Wednesday night now, by the time I got petrol, groceries and made my way home, it was 9.30pm -just in time for Fringe. I needed to wind down, so by the time my head hit the pillow and I fell asleep, it was probably close to 11pm. Not ideal when one has to crawl out of bed at 5.20am the next morning. But, crawl I did.
Due to a vehical breakdown blocking one of the lanes of the CityWestLink in the Lillyfield area, I'm about 5mins late for training. Not happy. I jogged up the stairs (knowing that I probably missed the actual 'warm up'). Sure enough, both guys were sitting on gym balls stretching their neck extensors. I took my spot in the middle and joined in.
I can keep pace with A, but B runs circles around both of us!! Sometimes I find that inspiring -something to strive for. Other times, I find it demoralising. Today it was both in equal measure! But I managed to get through the triceps circuit twice (bar the chest presses) in 15 mins. Pretty cool! And the biceps circuit I was short getting through it twice by 10 hamstring curls. Not too shabby!
I didn't think it was possible, but these circuits are finally becoming manageable. I know not to get too complacent though because J is already talking about mixing things up again! 3 minutes of Bliss. Roll up the yoga mat and it's time to dash off to work to have my shower and get ready to face the workday.
G is donating blood tonight so my intention is to get through as much of my work as possible in the extra hour that I'll have in the afternoon waiting for her to be finished. My day went mostly to plan- aside from hearing back from HR about my application for the Emerging Leadership course. Sigh. I didn't get in. And, surprisingly, I was quite bitter about it- even disappointed. Although I hadn't been overly desperate to get in, the fact that I was knocked back upset me. I guess I still perceive it as a rejection, no matter how logically I can view the situation.
I'm desperate to eat comfort food today- maybe the 'rejection' is contributing. I mentioned it to 2 of my friends at work. One told me that I should order what I want-without the noodles. I laughed at her and told her that what I wanted was a 'noodle' dish and it would be pointless without the noodles. My other friend didn't say much, but later when I met her in the lunch room around 3.30 to eat my 'healthy' lunch, she told me that her section had ordered Thai (just like they always do on a Thursday) but she completely avoided asking me! Normally, she'll ask, knowing that I'll say no. Today she didn't, knowing that I would have said 'yes'. Now, THAT is the mark of a good friend!
I dropped G off at home, stopped by Office Works to pick up some school supplies and Franklins to pick up potting soil for a cutting of a plant that I brought home from work today. G helps me pot the plant in a clay pot that we have around the side of the unit and then it's time for salmon. Yum! The Good Wife & Desperate Housewives (well part of it, cuz I know I need to get some sleep). Great end to the day.
Wednesday Feb 9 First Night Back at College
3rd day driving to work in a row! First day of college tonight. I'm excited and not excited at the same time. I know my good friends won't be coming back this year and I'm really going to miss them. I feel a bit sad about that.
Good thing I got to college early. They changed the building that our class is in. Tonight, it's in the yoga room- where we had our weekend intensive last December. I plunked myself down on the staircase, opened my lunch box, took out my nectarine and my sunflower seeds and dug in. It's tricky to read and eat a nectarine at the same time!
Wasn't long before one of my classmates appeared. We started chatting about our summers and discussing how many people were likely to be in our class tonight. Our lecturer walked in a few minutes later and answered that question. 5. Wow. Only 5 of us tonight.
I thought back to our term 2 Tuesday evening class. We only had 5 people then too, and I loved it! And we had the same lecturer tonight as we did back then. Should be good!
Straight in no kisses, as my friend Dom would say! We were given 2 pieces of homework tonight that are due in next week! And, the dreaded video camera made it's debut! We will each have 2 sessions that are recorded and then we will have to critique ourselves on how well we thought we did. WOW! Should make for a very interesting TERM!!
Petrol, groceries, Fringe, dinner and then bed.
Tuesday Feb 8 Workout
Another good night's sleep without the fan on. My legs are a little sore from last night's exertions on the treadmill. Should be an interesting training session this arvo. It's time to take new photos and measurements today. J shows me some new stretches and some new exercises to strengthen my knees. Then it's on to the normal circuit.
Working out with J is now an experience that I look forward to -especially since I don't seem to have the same motivation at home that I used to have. J pushes me beyond what I think I can do and as much as I grit my teeth and wish it was over, when it is over, I feel like I've truly achieved something.
Monday Feb 7
Finally the heat wave has passed! I think it will take more than simply one night to catch up on a week's worth of sleep, but man, did it feel amazing to sleep without the fan last night!
Today was a typical day at work. Not too much to mention.
Tough counselling session tonight. Still not too sure how I'm really feeling about it. Prolly take a few more days to process.
So, to help me get through the funk that I'm in, I decide to give the treadmill a go. Just for fun, I tried the 'personal fan' that comes with it--and believe it or not, when it's not +40 degrees, I can actually feel a breeze! Liking it a lot! I flipped through the booklet and found a program that suits my fitness level. It starts at 4kms/hr for 2mins, then 6kms for 2 mins, then 8kms for 2mins. Then, it's 4mins at 6kms, 4 mins at 8kms, 4mins at 6kms, 4 mins at 8kms. Then it drops back to 2mins at 6ms, then 2mins at 8km, 2 mins at 6kms, 2 mins at 8kms and finishes at 6kms for 2mins. All up, it's a 32 minute session. Perfect for me because I still have to push myself and I don't have to keep reducing the speed.
I'm pleased with my efforts. My knees are a bit sore. I'm hot and sweaty-but that's nothing a quick shower can't fix. And I know I'll be able to sleep now without tonight's session playing over and over in my head.
